Despite the fact that his phone is off, I've sent him eleven text messages. I'm not sure how he'll take it. Hopefully he'll see it as I do: I miss him a lot and want to make up for lost time and make sure I hang out with him before school starts. I wonder what will become of us. I wonder if I'll meet a cute guy. I wonder if I'll suddenly become attractive or if a guy will find me attractive. I hate the mystery of the future. I'm also tired but my mind is racing. I hate that when I try to talk to my friend she talks about her boyfriend. You would think she would be more considerate. But no. I know better than that though. I've learned not to expect her to do anything for me. Maybe this move will be good for me. I know know it will. I'm starving. I love stream of consciousness writing. It's very liberating writing nearly every thought. It's also a bit amusing reading the result. I love to read what I thought about situations as they are happening and how my feelings have changed since then. I hope he's thinking of me too. He probably isn't but if he is, I hope he's thinking that he should text me as soon as he can. I wish he could know somehow that I love him and I constantly defend him. I should text him that. I hope he's in my dreams. I hope I'm in his. In the good dreams. I wish he wished I was with him. I hope he got taller. I hope he hasn't lost what I loved about him most. I hope he isn't with his girlfriend anymore. I hope he wants me. Okay. I'm going to dream. Not that I'm tired... I just like to dream.
